


Sulfur

by jenelleman



Series: this love is in pieces [4]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alive Hale Family, Angst, Heartbreak, I’m sorry, M/M, So much angst, The Hale Family, all the Sterek feels, friendships are important, sterek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-12
Updated: 2019-09-12
Packaged: 2020-10-17 01:20:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20612573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenelleman/pseuds/jenelleman
Summary: The door swings open and Derek isn’t surprised (Stiles figures he heard, smelled him out here long before he knocked) to see him.“Derek,” The name taste like sulfur on his tongue and he chokes on it. He draws in a breath, prepares himself, and tries again.





	Sulfur

It’s hard at first.

But he does, eventually, move on.

________________________________

“You know, the thing is,” Stiles is probably, most definitely, too drunk for this shit

But Laura and Erica are there and he’s fucking missed them okay? So he downs the shot Erica places in his hand without so much as a flinch, and barrels onward.

“The thing is, you know, I don’t even miss him I think. Not really. Not usually.” He stops because it really hits him, just then.

It hits him so hard he can’t breath for a solid thirty seconds (he knows this because he was staring at the clock on the wall watching the second hand just tick, tick, tick, ever so slowly forward). 

When he does breathe, his breath is shuddering, and awkwardly loud in the somber silence of his living room.

He doesn’t meet either of their eyes as he does his best to make sense of what he’s trying to say, what he’s feeling.

“Like, like, it’s like. Okay,” he stops, then starts again. “Like I don’t even think about him anymore, not really. Okay like. I wake up and it’s just another day, you know? Like, I pour my lucky charms, get dressed, go to work, arrest a few bad guys here and there. And and and.

“And I don’t even ever think about him all fucking day. But then it’s like, when I get home I see his ghost everywhere and he’s never even stepped foot into this fucking apartment. But like, it’s like as I’m making dinner I think about how, how fucking good he was at like making itialian food? Like I’ll be making a fucking grilled cheese and just think that if he was here he’d be making me a lasagna because he knows how much I love it.

“And then I put on The 100 and wonder if he’s caught up or if he’s still behind because he was always so bad at staying caught up on our shows without me there to make him, you know? It’s the goddamn silence that I’m left in at the end of the day, that’s when I miss him,” and Stiles is kind of crying, kind of hysterically laughing and neither werewolf dare approach him.

And yeah, he’s only three months into this mess, so maybe he’s only fooling himself. But, really, truly, he doesn’t think he misses him, most of the time.

_____________________________________

Stiles remembers when he reached the three week mark and how he marveled at how he’d made it this far.

How the hole inside of him hadn’t ripped him open and left him in a puddle of blood on his apartment floor. He was sure that the day was approaching when he’d go supernova.

It would all just become too much and cause him to explode, leaving a crimson mess splattered upon his walls.

But six months in, and he’s finally learned that, that’s not what happens when your heartbreaks.

Sometimes though, he thinks he’d prefer it, if it was.

He’s currently at the Hale house, and Laura looks as if he’d just told her he killed her puppy. Talia looks pretty much the same, but there’s an understanding in her eyes.

Peter’s lips are drawn thin and there’s a hidden anger in his eyes that Stiles knows isn’t really directed at him. Cora stands next to her uncle, arms crossed, a frown etched into her features.

“No, you can’t just,” Cora waves a hand, more out of frustration than anything. “We’ll get rid of Derek instead. You can’t just  _ go  _ Stiles, we need you.”

“Derek’s next in line for Alpha Cor, you can’t just get rid of him. That’s not how it works,” Laura sounds as if she wished that that was how it worked though.

Cora lets out a growl, “well I don’t want him to be my alpha anyway so it doesn’t matter.”

“Cora no,” it’s Stiles that speaks this time. “You don’t mean that. We can still hang out and stuff.. just not here.”

His words hang in the air and the gravity of what he’s doing settles down on him and he suddenly finds it hard to stand.

He leans himself up against the wall to have some other form of support. Cora takes a step forward, arm outstretched towards him, but stops when he shakes his head.

“I’m fine Cor, it’s just a lot.”

She nods once, “This is your home Stiles. Don’t let him push you out.”

“It was his home first,” his voice is small, and broken, and it’s only slightly surprising when Peter flashes his eyes and emits a low growl.

“Peter please,” Talia’s voice is soft, but firm as she speaks. “There’s no need for such theatrics. Stiles knows he’ll always have a place here. But he’s trying to give Derek space, and we have to be understanding and supportive.”

Cora scoffs and stomps out of the room, Peter hot on her heels. Talia gives a small, sad smile, and follows closely behind.

She stops at the door, hovers really, before shaking her head and continuing on.

It’s just him and Laura left and he lets himself sink to the ground at the sound of her sniffling.

“Laura please don’t,” his voice is weak, and he feels like he’s about ready to cry himself.

“I’m just going to miss you is all. You’re my best friend,” he feels her settle next to him and he leans into her.

“You can still come see me, dork. I just can’t be here, where he is, all the time.”

“I understand,” she pauses, a long, but not quite awkward pause. “At least, I’m trying to. But you’re essentially cutting yourself off from the pack, rejecting your emissary spot, just to avoid my dumbass brother. It doesn’t seem like a fair trade off.”

“It’s too hard, it’s too much, it’s too everything Laur, I need to do this.”

She nods, wraps her arms around him and squeezes.

“I understand.”

And maybe she doesn’t, but that’s okay. Because he’s six months into this mess, and he finally feels like he can breath.

____________________________________

It takes Stiles longer than he’s willing to admit to, to figure out what really happened when he walked out of the Hale house six months after Derek broke his heart.

He only really figures it out because Isaac won’t return his texts, and Erica won’t touch him when they hang out.

He didn’t mean to do it, really. He swears it. He had really just wanted some space.

He hadn’t wanted to basically issue an ultimatum. He just needed to breathe.

But in the end he just tells Erica that he understands and doesn’t cry until he’s wrapped up in Lydia’s arms, Scott and Jackson sprawled over top of them.

His dad and Melissa look on in worry, but they don’t know what to do, don’t think there is anything for them to do.

Allison stumbles through the door at some point, hair a mess, out of breath, and cheeks rosy red.

“I brought Chocolate chip cookie dough,” she says holding up four plastic bags. “Because chunky monkey is for a break up and kind of overrated honestly.”

It’s when they’re setting up the ice cream and Chinese take out that it happens.

Lydia grabs the container of orange chicken out of Jackson’s hands, makes a joking comment about him watching his figure.

Jackson responds, almost predictably, with a dramatic gasp as he says, “I have never in my whole life, been so insulted.”

And Stiles lips quirk upward into some semblance of a smile, but it’s Allison that does it.

She lets out a snort and says, completely serious, “you don’t listen much do you?”

And Stiles laughs. It’s still broken sounding, and a little wheezy, like he hadn’t used it in a while. But, it’s a laugh.

Lydia’s eyes light up and Allison shoots him a grin as Scott bumps his shoulder and Jackson passes him the spring rolls.

No one says anything and he appreciates it. He shoves a spring roll into his mouth and motions for Lydia to start the movie.

He’s nine months into this mess the first time the thinks he’ll be okay.

_____________________________________

The day after Derek broke up with him Scott went to their house and packed up the rest of Stiles stuff.

So twelve months into this mess, Stiles still hasn’t been back to his old house.

He doesn’t really know what he’s doing there now, except that he finally feels like he can.

Like he can walk through the doors and not just completely lose it.

Derek’s camaro is sitting in the driveway and Stiles finds it encouraging that that doesn’t leave a knot in his chest. 

He still has a key, Derek never asked for it back. At first, he thought that maybe it meant something. Like maybe Derek was going to change his mind, maybe he just needed space. Needed time to himself, alone.

And Stiles was going to give it to him. It’s why at six months he cut himself off from the pack.

But at eight months he started to realize that maybe, Derek just didn’t care. Didn’t care whether or not Stiles had a key because maybe he changed the locks. Maybe he didn’t want to talk to Stiles, wanted him out of his life so bad that something as simple asking for the key back was too much.

At nine months, he’s able to accept that. To laugh and smile and consider going back to the Hale house because screw Derek.

At eleven months Isabella tackles him in a hug and Peter actually smiles and Laura and Cora are crying. Derek’s not there, and that’s okay. It’s probably better that he’s not.

Talia wraps him in a hug and Stephen wraps himself around the pair, his face buried in his wife’s neck. Erica, Isaac, and Boyd are there too, at the edge of the room. They don’t step forward, they don’t rush to hug him and it’s almost enough.

So at twelve months, he decides that it’s time. That he can walk through their house and come out alive. He’s not really sure what seeing Derek will do to him, but it’s time. He knows this.

He hesitates at the front door, and despite still having a key, he decides to knock.

The door swings open and Derek isn’t surprised (Stiles figures he heard, smelled him out here long before he knocked) to see him.

“Derek,” The name taste like sulfur on his tongue and he chokes on it. He draws in a breath, prepares himself, and tries again.

“Derek,” it comes out much easier this time and the man in question only smiles. “It’s really good to see you.”

And strangely enough, he finds that he means it. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> So, I’m sorry that it took me forever to update. I’ve had serious writers block. 
> 
> This is still super angsts, but I’m working on happier, fluffier stories I promise! 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this!


End file.
